I really like your idea of the shots and everything...and including that bit with Ed and Lu would be a great cameo for Skandar and Georgie!
Few questions though:
1. "Then cut to a scene of Eustace walking through the corridors and then after seeing the bullies/ them, ducks through a side door and eventually bursts into the classroom Jill is in. She turns around and sees him, and he trys to talk to he ("Oh! Hello... Pole... Sorry, erm, I didn't know you where.... Hi..) and she rushes past him and runs out of the room."
Why would Eustace be a little stuttering-y with Jill, don't they know each other? And why would she run out of the room? And I thought only the bullies called her "Pole" And don't the Pevensies know who Jill is? Wouldn't Eustace introduce her to them, and vice versa?
2."The teacher (female) is crying being comforted by two students. Other stuff, and Jill is sitting on a window sill reading (but you don't see who she is yet). "
Why is the teacher crying? Is her husband at war? Is the war still on in this book?
Why is Jill at the window reading when schools started? And why wouldn't the audience know who she was if in the earlier scene Eustace see her and calls her "Pole" and you see her clearly through the window while Eustace is saying good bye to the Pevensies?
3. To clarify...she
reads "you're next"...as in, it's in her book? She's not just saying it under her breath?
Sorry for all the questions...I really love all your ideas, I just wanted to clarify some things. (And I haven't read the book in years...so I forgot a lot
)